Many of us live life in an automatic-pilot mode and we don’t even know it. Our response is usually automatic and as others expect, without checking if that is what we truly want to do. Unknowingly, and over a period of time, stress starts to build up in our lives and we become unhappy, while we continue to believe that there is no logical reason for this apathy!
At such times their lives, my clients would mistakenly assign this apathy to feeling lost, and being oblivious to what their life path is. They would ask me “what is my Life Path?” I would answer “it lies in what you enjoy doing” typically they would then ask “How do I know what I would enjoy”, or “I don’t even know what I really want”, or “how do I know if I my decisions are authentic?” the simple answer I always give is “it’s in doing whatever makes your heart smile”.
Your Feeling Brain
The reason is that the heart is your feeling brain. “The intensity of electrical currents surrounding heart activity creates a field 1,000 times more powerful than that of the brain; 5,000 times more magnetically powerful”. Your heart not only feels but also senses and “reacts to future events 4 to 7 seconds before anything occurs” It knows you even begin to think!
I would go further and say that whenever
- you feel any tension
- experience guilt
- respond by saying or thinking “I should do”, or “because I’m expected to”
Know for certain that the choice you are about to make is not from the heart.
The reason is that we bring stress and tension unto ourselves, even feel guilty, whenever we reject joy. What your heart is really saying “I’m really into this” and you need to teach yourself how to listen to it.
The more you acknowledge what your true heart, or authentic-self desires (happiness or joy), the stronger your connection with it becomes; until the day arrives when you know that there is no other way of being, except from the heart. At which point we can truly say that our mind is the servant of our heart; and not the other way around.
At first, tuning into your heart may seem difficult. However, expect that at one point your life will seem unbearable if you don’t, and this is when you will be forced to “listen” to your heart. When you learn to live authentically, you will effectively be on your life path and able to fulfil your personal destiny, whatever that may be; and in what I refer to as Self-alignment.
Over the years, I heard often times from clients how their parents, wanted them to be “this” or study “that”; but what they want to be was something else – far from whatever they were expected to be. After years of struggling to live a “lie”, they finally opted out of the life they were expected to live and had the courage to start living the life they were meant to live.
I am inspired by a tale of an older relative of mine, who studied law as he was expected to. At that time, the “acceptable” choices were doctor, engineer or lawyer! As he graduated, he framed the degree certificate and asked his parents to hang it above the kitchen sink (where they could see it on daily basis) and then took off and did what he originally wanted! He became a very successful actor – a daring move at the time.
My point is not really about finding the right job, but about following your calling, your heart’s yearning. This is when a job becomes a vocation and joy starts to full your life.
© Sahar Huneidi-Palmer (the above article is an extract from my upcoming self-help book)