A thin sharp blade

I want to be a thin sharp blade

infinite brightness

blazing off my slender surface

shielding my slender surface with its light

I want hunger

infinite brightness

a thin sharp blade

I am hunger

a thin sharp blade

shimmering with infinite brightness

I am ephemeral and absolute

Still and thunderous

Dead calm and raging

Known and forgotten

Spotlit and haunting the wings

Hidden by a tree

Found hanging there

Come find me so I can disappear

so I can know I am unfindable

so I can be found

so I can elude again and be found again

and disappear infinitely

sneaking away like a burglar

with a black skullcap and a sack full of jewels

Come find me so we can fuse together

so I can escape into your pulse

slipping lightly under its surface

hidden by you and seared together

until I cannot be found

Come find me so we can glide lightly

caressing a pock-marked landscape

together with our treasure

that we are not one but two

you seen (beloved camouflage, my alibi)

and me hiding inside your pulse

Let me slip out of your pulse

and go away for a time

to wake up alone and remember

that it was a dream’s shard

and crave it again (one hit, my fix)

Let me hate you for a time

so I can know I am not inside you

that I have slipped into my skin

which I craved to leave

(which I never left, only dreamt of leaving)

which I pant to wear

sneaking away like a lover

with a black heart and a sack full of tricks

Let me hate you so I can know

I am a thin sharp blade

infinite brightness

so bright you cannot look

cannot unstick your eyes

by Juliana Farha

Copyright 2004